this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
Glitter + Penis = Best. Idea. Ever.
i woke up to see him pissing on your n64. thats like killing a unicorn. punishable by death for sure.
So apparently vaginal secretions are not covered under water damage insurance for my cell phone
he left me a 6 minute video of him peeling a clementine listening to justin bieber
just woke up to a 10 min voicemail of you singing "99 red ballons".... you need to work on your german..
We were making out when she went into convulsions. At least now I know she's allergic to peanuts.
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
You are the only one who would stop a bum, tell him to open up, then pour straight vodka in his mouth. You made his year.
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
I have fireworks and redbull; let's make heart attack inducing magic happen.
When did we convert life to cartoon?
we found him passed out on the baseball field with two 40oz and wearing a tophat.
Where did he get the tophat?
Did you catch one of my beer pong balls in your cleavage or was that a dream?
We should just do therapy together, clearly we have all the same issues. It's why we are friends.
Randomize
