I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
well this feels familiar. awake at the crack of dawn laying in the fetal position praying for the sweet release of death. i think im done with jager for a while
the worst part of it wasnt him peeing on the xbox. it was when he showed me his penis and made a kissy face at me. THAT was painful.
Dude I still wanna know who I had sex with on new years eve
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
i think the doormans mad at me
well we haven't pretended to pretend we were going to have a threesome with him for a while...
Who the fuck superglued glowsticks to my arm.
Tell me when you get here. I'm drinking beer in the bushes next to your house, and I put my hoodie up because I was cold. Pretty sure everyone lowkey thinks i'm homeless.
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
I just watched in amazement as you had a full conversation about water temperature and bacteria with your pet goldfish.
Actually, I take that back. You can only have it if I'm allowed to French braid the mullet.
Oh hello Jordan's parents, I'm here to have sex with your son. He's in the shower? Oh great, I'll join him
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