He's marrying her, which means that she is his most important person in the world, so you gotta deal with it...okay?
You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
Immaculate conception is definitely the most boring way to conceive a child.
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
At CVS buying just condoms. The guy behind me is buying just hotdog buns. There was a silent moment of understanding between us.
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
in hindsight, the duct tape banana hammock was a bad idea.
I think we should roll her a welcome back, sorry your godmom's on life support blunt.
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
I just karate chopped a humming bird out of mid air. It came at my face while I was out side smoking. Scared the shit out of me. My ninja skills just took over. Haha. I mean really at that point it was me or him.
Would it be inappropriate to do a science fair project on whether the type of drunk a person is is determined by nature or nurture
dude you're not even a fucking science major
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
I'm sitting on your porch drinking wine from the bottle. Just so your new neighbors know what kind of people are in the neighborhood
"Here let me wipe my uterus off your dick" was probably the most unsexy thing said after period sex. I should get an award
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