can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
you kind of just crawled on top of him. that was the point at which i became concerned with how drunk you were.
Apparently the last thing they remember of me was me stumbing into a bathroom, then falling out 5 minutes later clutching a butter knife repeating "ketamine goes in my face hole"
No, she isn't nearly as crazy as the girl who wanted to wear a vial of my semen as a necklace.
You tripped over nothing.. everyone stopped what they were doing and stared..you stood up and yelled "you win this time gravity"..then started chugging someone's drink
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
That's why you bone lesbian cage fighters and 45 year olds. To make life less boring.
Commuter bitches be judging your sister and her bag fulla wine. It's a motherfucking rosé, bitch!
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
This snow needs to melt so I can get wasted on someones front lawn
I'm worried about your health. And your boobs. Actually, health, then boobs. Health first, boobs second. And third.
I blew past the Governor's motorcade going twice the speed limit and DIDN'T get a ticket. God wants me to get laid.
I know I'm drunk but why am I receiving this handjob through the pant leg of my shorts..?
Ya i'm marrying the man who can hear/smell this level of flatulence and stick around
Randomize
