Hey when you come over to pick me up in the mornin bring a camera. This is going to be legendary. Don't knock.... They might cover up
we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
And a psychic told me I was pregnant and I am just so over life right now.
I just fucked my ex's ex's ex. Love quadrilateral complete
It smells like someone died in our apartment and ya'll used some random orifice of his body to smoke weed out of. Side note, how did we get a guitar?
I'll be there. With Doritos and whisky. Don't expect much more.
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
I feel that my cleavage set an unattainably high bar for 2013.
So I had sex in the woods today. Anything else that happened today? Irrelevant. It was a GOOD day.
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
So it's my mom's birthday and I wanted to be super cheap and just walk up to her and say "I got you the greatest gift ever, mom! I'm actually sober right now!".
I just saw a guy faceplant off a unicycle while holding a saxophone, while his buddy riding another unicycle and sporting a flute rode by laughing
Only at UConn...
Randomize
