everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
And then he said "I can't get blown while Gordon Bombay and Mr. Holland stare at me from the TV"
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
I knew the cheap date at Taco Bell would backfire because it makes even the most pre-cautious girls involuntary fart in public
I tried doing a handstand in the middle of the bar and I ended up kicking this old guy in the face and broke his glasses. Thats how I got kicked out
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
I am literally sitting on the toilet in utter disbelieve that last night even happened. My god that was only Monday.
For future reference, Twizzlers CAN leave welts.
Finally better. I had to use eye makeup remover to get the purple wine stains off my lips
Fucking her would be like seeing big foot, finding a four leaf clover , petting a unicorn, and arm wrestling a leprechaun in a matter of a 6 hour period
Got cut off last night cuz this chick had her hands down my shorts and was blatantly playing with my dick while I was trying to order. apparently that's "frowned upon"
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
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