You smell like stripper and shame
Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My vagina is so ashamed right now. It won't even look at me.
no, didnt close...
What?! she made the first move and invited you back to her place. thats like striking out in t-ball pathetic...
I think I slept in the cheesecake last night. Either that or I had a wet dream. Whatever happened I need to wash my pants.
Y'know, "Class cancelled because Professor is stuck in Mexico," is not something I expected in college. Let alone, "Professor is stuck in Mexico, AGAIN."
I will not fill you in on the details until we get back, so do not ask. I got peed on by the girl I was hooking up with last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
I honestly don't think it will ever get topped. Unless a real female cop arrests me, then fucks me. That's it.
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
I am never drinking with the goths again.
The night got way more interesting after Jimmy started doing summersaults in front of the bar.
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