"it" just moved
No more parties with babies... I can't do that again.
Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
Found an earplug stuck to the inside of my thigh this afternoon. Just how much noise were we making?
how do i say, "my ex is going to be at this party so don't look like shit" without sounding like a bitch?
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.
I just found out my college boyfriend's nickname is actually a Dutch word for little cucumber.....it all makes sense now.
There was a pumpkin carving contest and we carved a very realistic dick about to penetrate a vagina. Our Christian Youth hosts were not happy.
Apparently, acid is a good substitute for cash if you don't have any! Who knew?
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
I think the hamburger goblin stole my cigarettes. I left my purse behind her table and they're not in it now.
I don't care how many things you caught on fire, it's still not as bad as doing coke and then filming yourself having sex.
Randomize
