I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
So I was gonna stay in tonight but the president got me motivated! I will not quit. Bars here I come.
The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
she was puking red wine out the car window, telling me about how shes joining weight watchers tomorrow, not okay.
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh, AND I met a ukulele teacher that I'd date. So there's that.
Got drunk and passed out flintstone vitamins to everyone at the bar. I'm just so god damn motherly
My liver is whispering mean things about me to my kidneys. It's a fucking miracle I'm not hungover. Lol
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
I think one of my ovaries is committing suicide. But that is a topic for another day.
Dude, I'm at a wedding and there's a mashed potato bar and bacon strip appetizers. I'm getting all emotional.
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