Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
Lets drop out of school and be professionally skinny and drunk
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
So my professor just changed my Final to 7:45am on May 6th. Shouldn't a Spanish professor understand the implications of Cinco de Mayo???
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
I hope you realize, I'm counting on you as my wingman next semester. It's your turn to advertise another man's penis. I did my tour all freshman year.
After you verbally abused the McDonalds employee for not making your fries fast enough, the fact that you woke up on a random lawn does not surprise me.
Why didn't I see you last night!?
We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.
I don't think tequila will soothe the spots where my tonsils used to be.
But seriously who drew a dick on a tortilla and nailed it to the door?
Nothing like snapchatring dick pics to a\nMarried woman while your girlfriend destroys Taco Bell in the next room. Almost caught, worth it. Got boobs back
30 year old woman with braces and crocs came into the store today with her boyfriend. what am I doing wrong.
Me-World Problems: do I have my boyfriend come to my birthday party in drag, or is that too weird for the first time meeting literally any of my friends
I am officially in a love triangle with my celebrity crush
Randomize
