Twist it, pull it, flick it... Bop it was like the first time I touched myself.
My therapist says she wants to work on my 'trust issues'. I think she's found the cash cow within.
Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
She said "don't make this weird" and then proceeded to sniff me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
My mom just covered me while I peed in the street. I love her. i also love parents weekend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is pretty much a target on everyone's lips when I am drunk. EVERYONE
I have a 30 pack and enough condoms to last until tomorrow morning. Have Mystery Science Theater 3000 ready. I'm on my way over.
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
Just whisper "I fucked your boyfriend" in her ear and be done with it.
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