only if we run a train.
done.
I think "bars open christmas minneapolis" is the saddest google search i've ever done.
It's like trying to pry an octopus off you. Except the octopus speaks English and can get drunk.
"Every minute you spend hanging out with David is a minute you could spend meeting someone new, who isn't a huge douche" - Buddha
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
Did you just send me an ass picture with a quote from the lion king?
What are you gonna do about it?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Whoever decided to put a Denny's that close to the strip club is a genius.
He just yells "mush!" as they're having sex.
My life is literally "I'm too horny you can't leave" or "let's have pie" there's like no inbetween
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
The last time I saw you, you were giving the stripper a lap dance.
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
Randomize