she lunged for my junk like it was the cure for swine flu
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
Guy next to me at the plasma center is high and watching porn on his itouch. I am wayy to hung over for this level of poor.
update: last drink of the night and im naked in my porch hammock. life is good.
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
He just walked up to me in the kitchen, pulled out his penis and stuck it in my sweatpants pocket.
It was probably cold. Sweatpants pockets are notoriously warm.
Somehow I've got the party rigged to where I get a foot massage every time someone wants a beer out of the fridge. Hellz yeah
Just used the "Buddy" Poppy flower I got from a veteran to clean my one hitter. "I'm proud to be an American"
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
We used to bone, but now she's my life coach.
Pretty sure my boss knows there's Jack smell coming out of my pores right now... He just gave me a look...
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
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