WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
this may or may not be the weed talking, but this is by far the best tasting toothpaste i've ever had
it wasn't sex, it was awkward naked time.
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
It took me half an hour to realize I didnt know them
Don't be alarmed by all the Dick cakes in the fridge. But please don't eat..i accidentally broke one in half you guys can eat that one. Its labeled free Dick
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
Places I vomited today: hotel bathroom, in the cab to the airport, airport bathroom, airport terminal trashcan, plane seat 18E, and the plans bathroom
Fun wedding?
Yes. Very.
You took nana to a bar?!
she suggested it
Don't do it. It's 9 am on a Monday morning and I'm hungover. I can't deal with tears right now.
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
Ahhh, the bane of our relationship.... His mediocre penis
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