I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
I've never had a woman show me her venereal disease results in a bar before.
Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
got woken up at 7:30 by a drunk girl asking me where she was... apparently she slept on my futon
she was in a cheetah costume
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
So the bartender from Applebees totally looks like he would take his clothes off for $40
I like how you possess the gift that turns normal guys into strippers
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
Well you finally jumped into that tree you've always wanted into and some girl gave you an 8.5. You were very happy.
somehow attending a funeral viewing turned into me snorting cocaine in the bathroom and drawing ninja turtles for children
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
Welp, no use in crying over spilt milk. I can't unbang her.
I got the shit slapped outta me last night but the pain in my jaw doesn’t even compare to the hangover I have.
Randomize