I have funfetti in my underwear...will you come get me?
It's just like the Real World with babies
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
I only get commercials for vodka and Rogaine now. You're exactly right, Hulu. That's exactly right.
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
So you met him?
More like I walked in on him, drunk, naked, and doing "bathtub yoga". Please stop bringing your dates home.
I found a fingernail in my vagina. A fingernail.
Let's get really high and wear fake mustaches and try not to laugh at each other...
Vague recollection of me ripping your shirt off at the bar... I hope I asked first, otherwise that's real rude.
in other news i'm homewrecking via instagram
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
I have successfully trained your dog to bring me pudding cups!
we went outside for a smoke and when we came back in you were ptfo on the floor holding the phone to your ear. Pizza pizza was on the line.
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
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