Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
I'm at a winery and there's a 50 yr old woman sitting at a table alone with a bottle of wine and the only time I've seen her get up is to harass the hot dog guy
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
I was out with the drag queens until 7am. This is the hangover I needed to kick my ass back to sobriety. Dear Virgin Mary, fuck my life.
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
Right, try not to commit a felony that costs more than 4 dollars cause that's all I have in my bail jar.
Whoever decided to put a Denny's that close to the strip club is a genius.
I just had a 10 minute staring contest with my dog. Can you come over?
I think I just scared the sex out of my booty call. He saw me at the grocery store using one of those "future mother" parking spots right next to the handicap ones. He just made eye contact and drove off. I regret my laziness.
We lost you in the bar so we waited outside for you...next thing you know you kick open the doors and yell "I'M ALIVE"
Right. He was like "I'll be here all night if I have to..." I was like "Well then, I'll have to call the cops..."
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