Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
I hate how you keep a running list of people who have seen me naked.
Apparently I'm the guy that didn't get the memo that Afliction and wifebeaters were the proper attire for tonight... so I'll just sit here alone in my sweatervest and be judged.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you passed out on the bathroom floor with the door locked. we had to break in and no one was sober enough to move you so they just threw a towel on you and stepped over you
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
And dont tell me its his job to cockblock me just because he's my boyfriend.
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Cool. I might be making a sickly but incredibly well dressed wine drunk appearance in a couple hours
I gave him a handjob in the uber car. Life is really spiraling downwards.
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
I'm trying to behave my vagina this week so I can at least pretend I'm honoring the sanctity of marriage
she said she doesn't remember seeing me at all last night. ...I was with her for six hours, there's no way she could have been blackout the whole time
He was out clubbing with his SON. WHY did you let me KISS HIM? Also WHERE WAS HIS SON?!
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