if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
and then he said "my sister has the same underwear!" please come get me.
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
He thinks MY vagina is tight. That's saying something.
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
Depending on hangover severity. The fact that I can spell severity is in your favor.
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
Can I bring home a duck? Dead serious
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
Just so you know the unusual amount of skittles on your floor is entirely your own fault. You bought me 20 bags of them while I was high.
Ah, but I don't wear underwear. Every day is Commando Wednesday.
Just bought condoms with a walmart gift card. Thanks grandma.
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
I woke up to the sound of her peeing at the end of the bed at 4am.
Randomize
