brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
Would it be horrible to send my ex's girlfriend an email telling her that I sexed her man up so dirty that he fell asleep inside of me afterwards?
Sweetheart, you've always been a horrid bitch...
man, i hate rosetta stone. i wanted to impress this girl with italian last night but all i could say were things like "a blue airplane" and "he is wearing a white shirt"
Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
she's crying while babbling "all i do is win"
Omg calling you in 10 to update you on who I peed on last night
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
She showed up at 4:30 in the morning HAMMERED, stripped, demanded sex, then after 4 failed attempts stopped me mid-thrust to tell me she thought we should be fucking for a cause, like animal rights. Process that for a second. She wanted us to be fucking for animal rights.
All I want is dick and wine.
I have tasted many bathrooms
I'm pretty sure my calc professer is on coke. He's just too excited for this to be an 8am class.
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