Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
At a straight bar and poker face just came on...must...resist....urge to gay it up
Why would that come on at a straight bar? I thought they just played Don't Stop Believin and Wonderwall on repeat
I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
We have had massive layoffs this year, yet the guy who cant flush his shit seems to still have a job
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Pooping in your heated bathroom to the sound of rain and instrumental guitar might be the greatest experience ever.
I'm at the store buying plan b and vodka
the cocktail of hope
I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
the bartender cut you off himself after you started walking on tops of tables and hugging random people
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
Like there's an 87% chance I'll end up on the bedroom floor demanding sex while freestyling in your face. I'm going to buy rum.
That money I left you should go to the stripper that fell asleep in your bed. Sorry
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
Lube filled water balloons always make for a good time
But if you do poop yourself let me know. I want that as a tagline. "So funny she'll make you shit yourself."
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