I just gave my whole company pinkeye. How's that for a summer intern's lasting impression? BOOYAHH
I hate it when you make eye contact with someone bcs you are about to make fun of them and they take it as a hint to come hit on you.
my mom just told me its unladylike to have toothpaste stains on my clothes all the time.. if she only knew.
So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
I just had some guy offer to eat me out on my lunch break... I think single life is getting better everyday
Just had a 10 minute long conversation with my cat about how if I died, and he needed to eat me to live, I'd totally be ok with it. Definitely still drunk.
At what point lastnight did a lens fall out of my glasses and nobody tell me?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
When you licked the fourth stranger's cheek the bar tender pretty much ordered us to get you out.
I was just going for a one night stand and now I'm at breakfast with his entire family.
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
Randomize