break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
you sent me 5 happy birthday texts last night. one after the other. spelled differently.
these 2 russian guys walked past me and i got freaked out because i thought call of duty got real
I'd really appreciate it if we could dress up as pilgrims and indians for the thanksgiving eve bar crawl
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm a lady, I can't pee on the ceiling. Even I don't have that power.
He blended the pizza with water and drank the whole thing. He is my hangover hero
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
She told me about it right after. She said she was scared I would be disappointed. And I was, but I pretended not to be. Which pretty much sums up our relationship.
apparently domino's not only has a live feed of pizzas coming out of the oven, but it also has a built in smooth jazz radio station. this pizza's getting really pornographic really fast.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
I'm sorry that throwing up fish and Jamaican Rum in the back of your dad's car ruined our friendship
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
I knew it was Christmas when someone handed me a stocking filled with airplane bottles. Ps just woke up 3 days later
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
I missed you last night. I'm sure he will never forget the night i sang my heart will go on into his penis like a microphone
Randomize