my vagina is like the nba. its where amazing happens.
Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
lesson #67 learned in college: a three day old margarita, is still a margarita.
I'm naming my child veloci raptor. And you can be a part of its life if you want. But that's its name. Cause i have the vagina.
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
Definitely just blazed with the housekeeper. That woman needs a raise
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
It was like the titanic mixed with those sad puppy commercials mixed with jello shots
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
I'm sitting on the floor singing Bruno mars while they cook and occasionally pet me
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
The one that slept in my truck and you peed in his face?
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
HIGH AS FUCK. JUST WATCHED THE TRIPPIEST VIDEO EVER. IM NOT SCARED OF PANDAS. I GOTTA GO. TRIPPIN AGAIN
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