who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
how soon is too soon after the break-up to ask for my condoms back?
ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
pretty sure i saw you masturbating on chatroulette a minute ago. yes, i can recognize your cock
I THOUGHT I SAW YOU
She just told me she blew the waiter in the bathroom. Should I still leave a tip?
God gave him joint rollers for hands
I'm at your house, laying with your dog, eating taco meat, take your time.
The sorority chicks were the Persian army, and we were their 300 Spartans. Can barely stand up now...such a good ratio
Did you or did you not grab my boob while I was making out with the foreign kid?
Bought a gym bag tonight. Used it to bring my Taco Bell in the house.
He went to 7/11 first and came back with condoms and a banana "in case we get hungry"
As I took my shirt off he commented on how great my boobs where. I responded with "thanks, I grew them myself"
I just had a dream that I was fighting Donald Trump... Gotta stop watching the news before bed
Started dabbing in blow again because he always hated that I did it. Yuh I’m doing drugs but at least I’m doing me?
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