There are just some things I refuse to put in my mouth.
see... this is why i put birth control in all my friends drinks
wait.... you do what?
PS- did you die? If you did just text "dead" to me, so that I know.
these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
1. I feel like Jello 2. The girl i hooked up with last night isn't here and a different girl is lying next to me. 3. I have no clothes on 4. Can guys go on walks of shame?
Okay, thats embarrasing even by my standards and I've thrown up while wearing a viking hat. just a viking hat.
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know how hard it is to jerk off in a bathtub with a dog staring at you?
Some idiot from high school is in the hospital for bonging three beers up his ass
He should have died. Natural selection.
Everything was going great until my fake mustache fell off when we started making out.
I might as well walk around wearing a sandwich board and accept the fact that I'm dying single.
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
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