Is it normal to miss your booty call?
I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
He cooked the food on a paper plate in the oven.
his penis is like a homeless cat. ever since I've satisfied him he keeps showing up on my doorstep ask for more.
My new years resolution is to be alive new years morning
Can you come over to my place and make up for the crap you called sex yesterday?
Good morning to you
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
Passed out in a rocking chair on her porch. Woke up to the tow truck taking away my car.
What wine did you feed Jack? Might not want to waste the good stuff on kitties. Kitties only get box wine.
yeah I had to wear a fucking diaper from work home so I didn't get the shitty squirts all over my cars seats it was fucked
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
There is a special place in hell for people who only eat the center of the pot brownies.
God specifically crafted these hands to deal out orgasms.
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
Randomize
