is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
So stoned I forgot I was masturbating and went to go get a cookie.
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
I smoked weed with pregnant girl. I'm going to hell.
I'm going to buy you a pony but under one condition: you have to name it sarah jessika parker
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
I'm sitting here in nothing but my panties, eating beef jerky and reese's for breakfast.Today is not the day to expect me to make sound life decisions.
I was carrying around a bottle of Jameson yelling rescue me
I just found those cheese sticks in my purse. Along with a handful of confetti.
During my first week as an adjunct prof, I played a fiercely fought game of squash with a law student and we wound up having hot, sweaty, angry sex right on the floor of the court. She is either the best or worst thing to happen to my academic career. Will let you know.
"keg stand!" on a roof abruptly turned into "call the medics"
The progression was banging a stripper banging an unemployed stripper banging a sexual entrepreneur quarantining with benefits totally fucking whipped. Get it right dude
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