White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
Ketchup is God's man juice
dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
after last nights cooking expirments i have lost all faith in the fire alarm battery
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
hey as creepy as this sounds i still have your eyelashes on my desk
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
4 random people called me telling me they found him sleeping in the fetal postion on a driveway 45 minutes after we lost him
Shitshow foam night was such a success
I think we've entered a low point in our relationship when I'm sending you pictures of pubic hair designs "because they're funny"
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
I just ordered $70 worth of pizza and I'm not even ashamed. Happy Valentine's Day to me.
I should stop pointing to my vagina when I say "I'm in charge!"
I just apologized to a wet floor sign i walked into.
Randomize
