i feel like barbie the morning after an elton john party
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
i'm glad we're now at the level of friendship where we can comfortably discuss the quality of our shit
I woke up this morning next to a stack of saltines & a txt from u saying "do it." it took me a second to remember wat was going on
Then he wanted a handjob in the car. While my cousin was driving. To krispy kreme. And there was someone else in the backseat.
Jesus...So southern.
Exactly. So he deserves crazy "thanks for keeping me out of jail" sex. Or an "I'm glad your excessive cocaine habit had some positive outcomes" blowjob.
THAT IS NOT SOMETHING YOU TELL SOMEBODY THE FIRST TIME YOU MEET THEM IN THE DARK.
I need a "closed for the season, thanks for a great summer" sign for my vagina
He put on a roller derby documentary. It was either bore myself to death watching that or take off my dress. He was very appreciative.
I'm definitely not at Wal-Mart eating jalapeno poppers with an elevated blood alcohol content
She asked how comfortable I was with her while we were in the shower. She then proceeded to pee in said shower.
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
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