Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
cum and cheesecake for breakfast...don't fucking tell me pride week isn't awesome
I just peed on my pajamas. Its gonna be a long night. Don't forget the cookies.
The vomit I understand but how is there seaweed in my bed?
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
Goats are brash and offensive and cocky animals
Are you high and at a petting zoo again?
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
I didn't want to hook up with him so I just jumped out of bed, yelled "I don't even believe in god!" and ran out of the room
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
I'm trying to cause a divorce, your hooking up with a felon, I think we need Jesus.
My party ended early and I have a mountain of shrimp and weed
Guess how much it costs to flush your pants down the toilet?
Randomize
