Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
Goddamn it, are you fucking her sister?
did you know it's going to storm tonight?
You bitch. At least tell Laura she's a better kisser.
so i woke up this morning covered in mail. none of it is mine.
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
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i am pretty sure she ate my hamster last night. i am thinking this because she left me a note that says she ate my hamster and my hamster is no longer in its hamster cage.
We still need to grow old, buy a house, and drink 40's while wearing old people sunglasses, staring at the young studs mowing our lawn.
Marking my student's "don't do drugs" posters while simultaneously texting my dealer, is this what being a grown up is like?
and then i signed some dudes back with a turkey hand print in honor of thanksgiving
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
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I'm going to write a new song and call it "Did I wax my vagina for this?" remind me to never go across the country for a penis ever again.
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
He said he couldn't fuck me cause I kinda looked like my brother
I went to bed early to get up and have a cup of coffee and watch a Sunday sunrise; and again you come home with no shirt and more stamps than my passport. Get the fuck up now, you are taking an Uber to waffle house. The order is in you name.
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
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