I haven't gotten laid in forever. I'm obsessed. I imagine I this is how Ethopians feel about food.
She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
no you're not listening to me HE WANTED TO BRAID MY HAIR
He managed to completely creep out every girl I was with last night. It was almost inspiring how efficient it was.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
i really regret not blowing your cousin before he went to jail
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
Too bad pet owners lack respect for my training in ancient Buddhist and holistic rehab therapies.
I'm not sure the Buddhist consider pot brownies holistic rehab therapy
Just got offered bathroom sex. I've never been more flattered.
My walk of shame turned into having to get his dad to tow my best friends car out of the snowbank in his driveway
Ask me if I'm sitting naked in a lawn chair eating a block of cheese waiting for a bacon grilled cheese sandwich
I probably shouldn't be taking relationship advice from my side piece...
Randomize