we're taking shots every time my dog licks his penis. we're on number 8 now.
you should have been aborted.
The cab driver just finished telling me how leaving community college after one month was the best desicion he ever made.
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
I woke him up and he was mumbling something about it being moist, or he peed himself but it was okay.
I've started making all these amazing things...like bananas rolled in doritos..bandritos.
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
YOU WORK IN THE US CAPITOL! YOU CANNOT HAVE SEX IN THE BATHROOM!!
Dude, you are totally ruining intern season for me...
We should. Taco Bell definitely gives me the shits though.
It's girls night. No shame, just febreeze
I fell asleep in the bathroom during my mothers dinner party with no pants on. Her friend walked In. I was told to not come back.
Not my fault people bought me shots. waving a shot in my face is like waving a cock in yours
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
We damn well better have a snow day tomorrow. We just broke out the rum.
Randomize
