i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
This is awkward. You have a four minute voicemail from me. I would delete it. I accidently hit your number on speed dial and called you while I was vomiting a mai tai.
Ur just texting me random shit. That's what Twitter is for
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
You crowd surfed from beer pong into the bathroom where you spent the rest of the night, also I have your wallet
Also this is super embarrassing but sorry for licking your chest
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
Bourbon is too strong for my cat, he does not want to drink it
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
I'm so drunk and angry about the Michigan game the fact of my relationship being over doesn't matter
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
Randomize
