Sometimes I wonder if my friend studies mystic Christian theology because he's afraid to come out of the closet. Evidently, it's okay to talk about God coming inside you, but not to say the same about dudes.
guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
I just google mapped his house on satellite so i can really see how much money he has. Does that make me shallow?
So I answered the door in my underwear expecting my boyfriend. Instead I opened the door to Mormon missionaries. Do you think that was a sign from God?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just told this girl who bought a pregnancy test "good luck"
my roommate's gf just broke up with him and hes in his room crying and listening to coldplay while beating off to pictures of her...
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
when she asked where we met, i said the liquor store. the next words out of moms mouth? 'oh that's real promising molly'
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My head is just one big fuzz right now.. Its like someone replaced my brain with a teddy bear
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
There is a check pinned to the wall at Connor's. It's a check I wrote for $1,000,000... To you. Clearly you made out well on St. Patrick's day. Thanks for being too shitfaced to remember to grab that.
Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
just made a presentation to 40 students and my professor about morals and ethical issues..still drunk. at 8am. I wish I could remember how it went.
Randomize