Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
he drove an hour to get eggs with me not even a blow job, just eggs.
I feel like none of my dresses scream slut the way I'd like them to
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.
I have a gash on my leg an a lobster leg in my purse.
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
Someone wrote "gnarballz" on my fridge in black marker. I'm pissed, but more concerned I slept with the one who did it
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
Wait is this place where the strippers are missing teeth and I think one is missing a thumb? Though I don't know how she would maneuver on the pole without a thumb. Pls advise.
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
Randomize
