Who was that guy you went home with?
Hang on, I'm trying to ask his name right now.
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
Any day you don't mysteriously wake up in the garbage is a good day.
Yeah, I wouldn't mind getting fingered in the corner of a dive bar again.
Jordan and I are drunk and barred out at the liquor store sitting in the awesome $70 Corona bench bargaining with the owner for a lower price, all while passing the Belvedere bottle between the two of us. Real life. College has down this.
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
No, no, we have to calibrate. What is the maximum amount of trouble we can get into without going to jail?
All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched
You know it's a good weekend when you wake up on Sunday questioning your sexuality.
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
I just want nice things and good sex
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
he taught all the little kids to ski. it was stupid hot. i'm pretty sure my ovaries exploded.
I just bought a bottle of lube for my car.
Guess who has two thumbs and broke her boyfriends dick?
Randomize
