hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
I really wish I could go back in time to change the course of events that led to me sitting on the internet at 3 Googling 'Traumatic masturbation' while talking to you about failed dates, and running a virtual restaurant in a video game.
She told me she was selfish for not giving me a blowjob... I couldn't agree more.
i am exhausted. it's been years. we both know his dick is small. the jig is up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am too drunk to make real decisions. I had pop rocks all over my ass earlier. This is not a joke.
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
I just threw up blood. Also i just remembered i got hit in the face with a 2 by 4.
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we got kicked out of her coke dealer's house when we wouldn't stop quoting "a league of their own"
communist
I may watch porn and eat a baked potato covered in chili in bed
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
I swear to God if you start calling your dick “my pegasus” we’re not friends anymore
I had to put my dog down, accidentally outed my brother, and was given a fucking fish sandwich instead of a Big Mac ALL IN ONE DAY! Am I really the person you want to consult for advice? Hhhmmmmmm?
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
Randomize