So i had sex for a couple seconds last night
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
I mean can we take a second to high five on our sex life? I love us.
I'm wearing your poncho, and only your poncho. I'm not getting pulled over like this.
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
Happiness was finding the hidden Gatorade in the fridge
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
So do you remember the bartender that caught me when I fell off the bar 4 weeks ago? He hasn't been to work since...Woops.
You leaned over to me in the elevator and whispered "how long do I have to pretend to be sober?"
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
Randomize
