What time are you coming? Can you stop and get mouse traps and trojans?
You have mice?
no why?
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
while cleaning my room, i've found many wonderful things. one of these is the card you gave me for my eighteenth birthday. it's a christmas card that says "i want to stick it in your sponger"
he thanks me after handjobs.
you found the perfect man.
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
Pretty sure that I got the MVP of wedding reception... woke up on the bench in the hallway of a hotel and we did NOT start the night there.
Oh my god I peed in a park last night and then tried to set off fireworks with a group of middle-aged men
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
The difference between 22 and 28 is bigger than I realised. I had the urge to put on Spongebob and give him a cookie.
I need to start journaling my drunk thoughts. Drunk me is fucking brilliant & sober me is missing out.
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
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