i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
the semester isnt officially over until i take the batteries out of my calculator and put them back into my vibrator
I found him with a guitar and his kitten in his room. He was singing a song he'd titled "you're a cat". Guess what most of the lyrics were...
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
I just threw up again because I opened my eyes... God is laughing. I resorted to taking the Mexican Dramamine because I feel seasick from walking. Not helping.
you were drunkenly making out with a 20-something in front of your wife. at least the guy your wife left with was decent looking.
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
Well I shit myself on the way home from work today so there's that...
I'm drinking vodka out of a water bottle at work. Am I really the best person to come to for life advice?
He is married, and has a regrettably large penis. I need to find another one right away to get myself out of this mess.
How big does a penis have to be before it becomes regrettably so?
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
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