their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
I want to be a jewelry store heckler. "Hey man, is she really worth it"
Got blown by one of the bridesmaids. Family BBQ today. They all know. Talk about awkward.
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
You had us pull over so you could pee, you proceeded to pee in some random persons front yard while yelling "im not ashamed"
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
Doing lines off a plate that says, "things go better with coke."
If making out with three guys at once at a Kesha concert while simultaneously smearing glitter all over yourself doesn't convince her you're gay, nothing will
Doug will be the one to get my vagina. I don't know when or how but I'm now declaring that it is his. And he better not disappoint.
So, Cheetos don't microwave great.
You "drove" the computer chair around the party for a good fifteen minutes. you would crash into things, freak out, and yell for an ambulance.
Here's the thing. Kinda drunk. Eating leftover soup. In bed. Watching Disney channel.
Just remembered sticking my head out the window as i drove us to walmart and yelling that i was a golden retriever.
Also, sorry for verbally assaulting you when you asked if you could dump the bowl.
Dear Douchebag, I would just like to formally issue this fuck you. You will be receiving a letter in the mail soon. With all of your stuff.
Randomize
