I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
she's laying in my bed with an ice pack on her vagina. how do you think it went?
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
We found you in the middle of the road chucking gravel because "the house was too far away".
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
In times of desperation, never...NEVER put green apple scented hand sanitizer on your vagina.
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
The only rule I'm making for myself tonight is to not drink out of the sink at the bar.
Too bad, iambic pentameter is a drunk specialty of mine.
I lost all interest the day she banged that guy in the Amazon parking lot. That's a special kinda whore.
Let's just say I peed the bed last night, and I wasn't in it alone. Whoooops
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