Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
after last night, i judge her for not breaking up with me
He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
homeboy just tried to sext with me at 8:30 in the morning while I was on a job interview...
so you did it...
obv...but still...it was inconsiderate.
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
Well if he truly loves me he will just have to accept my flaws. And that includes a tequila dependency and borderline lesbianism.
Target doesn't accept your signature for your credit card if you draw a dick on the pad. Even of your name is Richard.
He told me to come in and have some water before I drove home, my vagina didn't stand a chance escaping. We didn't even make it to the kitchen.
my nose is crying tears of wow.
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
My vagina doesn't have a refer a friend program. You don't get $25 for getting your friend to have sex with me.
The hat, the beard, the hard posing - like who does he think he is?
A bag of dicks
That's dating life
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
Fuck the system, do you have any medieval weapons?
Randomize
