yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
twelve hours since my last beer and i just blew a .08, time to go to the library
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
He was drunk at Denny's at 5 am saying how Dear John was the worst movie he has ever seen... eyes filled with tears.
You know why I moved here? No public intoxication law. A cop just helped me from my bent over vomit pose, asked if I was ok, and gave me a ride home.
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
i'm about to tell me dad "sorry staying in isnt an option. i'm fucking a marine tonight."
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
spending today hungover and untagging myself from all the pictures of me kissing girls so grandma doesnt have a heart attack. how was your new years?
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
All my interactions with my brother are drug deals at this point
If someone made a breakfast cereal that was a cross between lucky charms and fruity pebbles and called it unicorn power with a huge fucking rainbow and a unicorn standing in a pot of gold on the box, they would be rich. Not only monetarily but spiritually as well...
Seeing your boyfriend, side piece, and great white buffalo, all in one night? Its a sign right?
Proceed with caution.
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