I was taking a piss and started puking. I pissed myself and made a mess in the bathroom. Passed out, then got up and went back out from 11pm to 5am.
I changed 4 diapers and slept horribly in our hot apt. Now, I'm at my inlaws house watching the Rangers get pummeled. Oh how our lives differ.
'fingered' and 'feelings' NEVER belong in the same sentence.
after last nights cooking expirments i have lost all faith in the fire alarm battery
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
If I wake up with an unknown penis in me one more time I am literally going to press charges to the makers of tequila.
Get in your clown car, pick up everyone you know, and head to the park. drunk Sledding grand prix tonight. winner takes home the leftover beer
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
I distinctly remember telling him "I'll suck your dick while you eat pizza"
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
Remember, I smoked so you wouldn't have to. I'm like the Jesus of Marijuana.
Puked up breakfast after doing my first minze shot in a while, but that shot was to Trump losing the election, so it's all good.
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