That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
2 bagels in my tummy and my herpes on my mind
So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
Just made a coke joke and literally drooled on myself. How do we feel about pavlov's theory of conditioning now?
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
come in to starbucks and ill make you a 4loko latte before theyre banned
I'd say I'd distract him, but I lose my psychic powers when guys get girlfriends. And by psychic powers I mean taking off my top.
If that's all it takes to cure your hangovers then you need to drink more.
We started pregaming at 8. It's 11, and her only 11:11 wish is to be sober. It's hard to not love her.
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
How many fucks given?
0.12846
God is tempting me with everything tonight. Brownies and dick, mostly.
SPICY FOODS AND BLOWJOBS DON'T MIX.
YOU SAID YOU'D TRY ANYTHING ONCE YOU LIAR
what happened last night?!
you took a shot and then laid down on our kitchen table and passed out.. then when we tried to move you to the couch you screamed "no! i love tables"
Randomize
