laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
I'm going to get a baby outfit made and send it to her that says: "My husband fucked his subordinate and all I got was another baby".
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
your tears are not going to buy me drinks...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My landlord wasn't pleased about the new fire pit we built him.
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
The beers last night were like the tears from god
Let's just not urinate on things that don't need to be urinated on
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
I don't fucking know. He perched his parrot on his dick. I left after that.
Dollars spent: $83, Girls kissed: 4, Girls slept with:2, Girls currently making me breakfast: 1, Fucks given: 0
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
where are my pants?
in the oven.
2020 sucks, I want a refund
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