I've heard semen is good for your skin though, so that pimple on my chin should clear right up.
Being pregnant is so damn inconvenient for my sex life.
From the crime scene it appears that I attempted to throw up into a candle.
She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
Max was wondering if he could trade you sex for the use of your jumper cables
I said:" get your jacket, get your beer and get the fuck out of here"
Firing someone with a rhyme is the new high point in my life.
The guy you hooked up with is asleep in the tub. I just pee'd and he said 'turn off the tap' before snoring again.
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
I'll explain later but basically I was feeling dangerous, I'm dressed as Ann Romney and Ann Romney is a bad bitch.
About to throw up, bathroom line up, Bro sees me. Yells, 'PUKER GET OUT OF WAY' THEY ALL PARTED WAY THREW ME INTO A STALL AND CHEERED AS I THREW UP INTO THE TOILET. we are going back
I'm the only person who goes to break up a friends with benefits and comes out with a boyfriend
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
Randomize
