I have got to lose weight!! Apparently no one wants to fuck a fat chick with herpes.
Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
You smell like stripper and shame
I ride home in a shopping cart. Don't at like you aren't jealous.
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
i think that dennys waitress has my boxers
I had another sex dream about you but it was very dissatisfying. As you finished you starting singing the star spangled banner. then you left. I was not amused.
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
Let me tell you how my drug dealer wants me to take his girlfriends little sister to jr prom
I'm keeping track of how many times I've said "Shhh, act like you're not naked." in my life. So far, 3 times.
Just took acid. Wish me luck.
I worked out twice today and you're dropping acid. My life sucks.
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
Just let me put on a bra and brush the alcohol out of my hair.
Let's do something tonight. I feel like setting things on fire.
When do you think the murder is going to happen in this Lifetime movie of ours?
Randomize
